I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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