Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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