i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
