And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize