tell your sister to shave her snatch
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
So much Jack, so little girl.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
