somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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