I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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