If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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