Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize