I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
