we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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