I can text with my tongue
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I just had sex on a roof
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize