I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
