i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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