we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Holy shit dude........stairs
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize