I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize
