im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
