a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
