Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
