I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
this is an emotional support booty call
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
