ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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