For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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