Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
