How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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