I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
