Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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