I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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