Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
