Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
It's never too late to be topless.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
This is classic penis vs brain.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
