is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
