Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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