I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
