Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
he's gonorrhea incarnate
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
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