I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Randomize
