Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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