i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
this hospital has no fireball
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
