I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize