He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
