I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
