you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
