i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
