i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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