This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
