Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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