so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
