physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
