Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
