she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Randomize