Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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