remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
