Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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